Tuesday, August 14, 2012

The Master of Disbelief




I am a Master of Disbelief -- yep, the Science of rejecting the possibility of the actual happening of a thing, a situation or a person that I so-o-o-o want in my life. 

I was an expert at Disbelief since childhood. I proved that theory true over and over again. I was born with the Silver Spoon of Disbelief in my mouth.  (It's probably the only thing I believe in...) I could be royalty in the Kingdom of Disbelief, I swear. A Princess. Her Royal Highness. 

I had an early start. I practised disbelieving since childhood. A child genius, I was. As a mite living under my parents' roof, going to school and doing all the things that normal children that age do, I disbelieved that I was worth my parents' love. 

Then, I brought that science with me to my teenage years. Oh, how I proved myself right again. I really did grow up well. (Smile with a smirk). It was the time of my life -- to disbelief that anything I wanted could ever happen -- the cute guy, the exam scores, the dresses.... everything that I wanted then, was NOT going to be mine! I should have felt delighted.

Then, in my adult years, I practised that Science at work too -- disbelieving every step of the way that I was worth that job, or that promotion, or that salary. I disbelieved that I was worthy of being in the right relationship with the right guy -- that he'd even want me in the first place. Oh, how could I have even believed that! 

Then, I founded my own company. Oh, wow! My dream come true, all my ambitions being realized at last, all that I ever wanted to do! I was on my way -- NOT! Again, I proved that I was THE MASTER OF DISBELIEF! Haha! It should be funny. It should tickle my bones to know that I am right -- yet again! I am not just a Master of Disbelief. I am also a Prophesier. 

My life has been success after success -- whoopee -- of Disbelief. I don't need to live another lifetime to understand its ins and outs. There are no steps to follow. No guidebooks to read. No book for me to write and publish -- except this little article.

So, having achieved mastery, what's next? Exactly. What's next? Been there. Done that. Oh, you don't know how far I've been and how much I've done. I can't even believe my own achievement. I'm so proud of myself. Yay....

Something happened just a few weeks ago. I had been practising Disbelief as always, and yet for years I wanted to also master Belief. Maybe it was an invisible arrow from the heavens; a lightning strike in my soul; caved-in moments in the recesses of the universe.

I suddenly knew. I knew -- not just a little, not just bit by bit. But I knew! I actually knew! Now I know 100%. 

I know what is Belief.

No comments:

Post a Comment